This is kinda short chapter, i'm still developing things but i hope you enjoy it.

CHAPTER 1: Wes and Fury

Wes walked down the dirt road. Parallel to the road stood a vast forest. It was tranquil, the only noise was the scuffing of his boots and the padding of his tiger Fury. Wes was only 15 and has been traveling since he was 8. He had no choice but to travel, he had to know what happened, what happened to his home his family; and why it happened.

Fury was a normal tiger plain and simple. He and Wes meet a while ago during an incident at a town. They needed each other at the time, after that they decided to travel together. They had been traveling together for no more then a month.

Both of them had no real idea where they were going, just following fate, wherever it took them. They’ve been scarcely making enough money to eat. They’ve been taking odd jobs off and on. Many times when they didn’t even have enough money to eat they stole from stores. Wes was really against the idea but it was better then starving.

“How long is this dang road gonna last?” Fury asked agitated. They have been traveling on the same road for more then half the day, only stopping once to take a nap.

“Dunno,” Wes answered simply. Then, there was a long silence. After a couple of long minutes it began to rain.

“Geez badluck and poverty must really like us,” said Wes. Almost in response, the small shower became a storm.

“Yeah thankyou!” yelled Wes toward the sky. The two banked off the road toward the tall trees. They stood there for a second dripping wet. Then Fury shook off sending a barrage of water at Wes. Wes just stood there staring at Fury then said in a sarcastic tone,

“Yes, Fury that really helped now I feel much better.” Fury looked up at the soaked Wes and simply replied,

“So… I’m dry.”

***

After another hour of walking, and practically ripping each other’s throats out, they finally reach a small town. There wasn’t any around, just two rows of small wooden houses with some of them having small black clouds rising out of their chimneys.
Wes stood there remembering how his town looked like this, well before…

“Come on let’s go!” Fury snapped at Wes. The two quickly made it toward the inn, forked out a couple pieces, dry off, and rested. In the morning they’d seek information on any local battles, or unofficial tournaments, and look for some cheap food.

Wes couldn’t participate in any real tournaments because he was not a registered rancher. He really wanted to be but he couldn’t because he couldn’t afford a ranch, he could barely afford a decent meal! He always tells himself that some day he’ll find a small little ranch to live on and raise all kinds of cool monsters.

What Wes didn’t know is that fate had something soon planned for him. His destiny will soon reveal itself and begin to unwind. The answers he has been looking for will soon be found. It’s only a matter of time…

-Nicholas D. Wolfwood-

not a bad setup, wolfwood. your characters take a kind of middle ground between the cartoon [where the monsters talk with the humans] and the game [where the monsters are trained by the humans for battle]. as such, you have an opportunity to develop a unique world here. good luck!

Excellent!


I'm glad your taking this up, it can be quite enjoyable. However, like most other stories I read, I'll stand on my little soap box for a moment.

The one thing that you can do to add to the depth and visualization is to use more adjectives(i.e. ugly, pretty, massive) Basically descriptive words. I take it that Fury is a pure Tiger, but some nice descriptions of your heros(or villans, who knows?) would add seriously to your setting.

That is one fault and, I am amazed to say, virtually the only one. If another did exist, it would be to length, but you already said your still working on this one. Word 97 sure cracks down on the spelling errors, huh? :0)

Any way, I agree with torey. You've got the choice to dive this into more of the MR television series or lean more into the game itself with a single chapter. Perhaps you can muggy-wump the whole on the divider, or a solid ground.

In short, aside from the above mentioned flaws, quite impressive. Yet, this is your first work?